Tuesday, December 8, 2009

There is a Special Place in Hell for Harry Reid

I have this really weird recurring dream. I am on a large sport fishing vessel somewhere in the Thimble Islands where I grew up. Mounted in the rear cockpit is the world’s largest skeet launcher. Loaded in the machine are not your usual clay pigeons but Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi. I am positioned at the stern with a rocket launcher that is armed with Rush Limbaugh and Glenn Beck.

As I yell pull to the operator of the skeet machine who happens to be Abe Lincoln, Reid is catapulted through the air ass over tea kettle; glasses tossed into Long Island Sound and his plastered hair coming out of place and obscenely bouncing about. As I take aim and pull the trigger Limbaugh is rocketed at the target hitting Reid square in the abdomen, both men turning into a fine pink mist as somewhere a demonic minion opens up the gates of Hell and welcomes whatever it is that passes for their souls. Likewise goes the second shot as Beck hits Pelosi dead center and sends them to their new eternal home.

Usually I wake up from this dream doubting my sanity and feeling somewhat guilty for my subconscious’s apparent disrespect for life no matter how evil it may be. But, then I almost always end up reading a headline that goes something like this: REID LIKENS REPUBLICAN DETRACTORS FROM HEALTH CARE PLAN TO LAWMAKERS WHO BALKED AT ABOLISHING SLAVERY.

As stupid as my dream may seem to you and me, even more supremely stupid is this moron. Reid certainly has a long long laundry list of despicable deeds, but this one really takes the proverbial cake.

Are Congress people and Senators absolved from learning anything about US history? The way I read it, it was the Republicans that were the bastions of abolishment. I am pretty sure that is the way most people read it as well. To suggest otherwise just shows that not only does Reid need to be hit up side the head with a nice thick history book, he also should crack it open and read it. That is, if he can read.

Limousine liberals have this unique and quite amazing way of taking anyone’s accomplishments and assimilating them as their own. This is a phenomenon that seems to take place every time Democrats get a majority in the Houses. I remember hearing a State legislator once say that Abraham Lincoln really wasn’t a Republican at all (technically he wasn’t, he was a Whig) but was a Democrat and therefore it was Democrats who were really responsible for the Emancipation Proclamation because there was no way Republicans could possibly be for freeing slaves. Oh, really?

Were I a Democrat, (God forbid) I would be pretty pissed off at Reid too. I personally would like to see every racist residing in the same annals of Hell reserved for the likes of Reid and Pelosi, and I kind of assume that is how most reasonable people would feel. I think it is really interesting that Reid’s rhetoric congers up images of slavery whilst an African American holds the highest US office. Likewise, gaffe-meister Biden’s use of the hanging metaphor while introducing Lord Falderal (my new name for Barry is Lord Falderal) at the jobs conference last week. These are really disgusting and blatant attempts to get attention. Is there anyone who really wants to hear this shit, black, white, Democrat or Republican?

I have an idea Reid, you jackass, how about sticking to the issues for once. Your health care plan sucks. Try listening to the opposition and working something out. Twisting around history helps no one at all.

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